A glimpse of the past

Frederick was used to the stress of handling various things at once, but since his father’s death, everything had become a whirlwind of a mess that he hadn’t been prepared for. Though just by looking at him, one would never be able to tell that he felt under pressure or stressed. The man was notorious for hiding his emotions well, always keeping a smile and pleasant expression on his face.

Preparations needed to be made for Henry Hale’s funeral service. Finances needed to be sorted out. The man had been so tight with his money that he actually had a few small debts that could have been easily paid off and Frederick wasn’t entirely sure why they hadn’t. It was just one more thing he would have to deal with. Were it still winter, and the slower months, it may have made all of this easier, but with the Social season beginning, that meant parties and pleasantries had to be in full force. Not only did he need to sort his own life out, but he had to ensure his younger sister was cared for and would find a proper suitor, despite not wishing her to have to go off on her own. Not just any man would do for Birdie.

He had run into an old friend, Noah, on the streets at that moment. He had been on his way to meet with the undertaker to finalize preparations for his father’s services and the payments needed. Frederick was appreciative of the current distraction, however, and after Noah’s words of condolences were made, they quickly caught up on what life had been like- or rather, his friend talked his ear off on what he had dealt with in the last several months.

Noah was a married man. His wife just recently gave birth to a baby boy. He had no siblings to look after. Both his parents were still alive and well. They were all things Frederick could not really relate to, and although he should feel resentful of his friend, he didn’t. He was genuinely happy for him and that he was so happy and felt fulfilled. “Ah, that is so great to hear. Congratulations on the birth of your son.” Frederick smiled and clapped the man on the back.

It was then that he got that strange feeling that he had eyes on him. Although he was sure that would slowly become the new normal once word fully got out of his father’s passing and his inheriting Blackburn. All eyes would be on him now and the gossip would be heavy if he wasn’t careful of his every action. It was tiring, really, and he wasn’t certain if he was ready for the added pressure.

A smile remained on his lips as he continued to listen to Noah, nodding along with him as if he were fully paying attention, but he let his gaze drift up and away, spotting the three women staring directly in his direction as they spoke to one another. He offered a warm smile and a nod of his head. Light brown eyes nearly shifted away and back to his friend, but then he spotted her.

Oralee. Noah’s voice quickly began to tunnel and he could barely hear what he was saying now. His breath caught in his throat and he found himself staring right back at her. She had broken things off with him and had made it perfectly clear that she could no longer see him. What he hadn’t expected was this feeling of heartache all over again just by seeing her there. She looked lovely as ever.

“Freddie… Hello?” He felt himself being shaken and finally turned his gaze away and back at Noah who had caught him in his brief trance. He laughed and squeezed Frederick’s shoulder. “Perhaps this season you will find a lady? I think it’s about time you settle down, my friend. Now that you are a Viscount.” He smirked and shrugged his shoulders. “I will leave you to it. We shall have to have you over for dinner, then. Soon.” Frederick nodded and smiled politely. “Of course. I would love to.” Noah nodded and spoke his farewell before leaving Frederick alone.

For a moment, he hesitated. Oralee didn’t wish to see him, she had made that clear to him, and he wished to respect her wishes. But he didn’t want to come across as a cold-hearted man who could not act like a civil human being, especially since he had most likely made it obvious that he had been staring at her.

Slowly, he made his way towards the vegetable stand, moving just beside where the small group of ladies were standing. He nodded again to them, smiling politely. “Good morning, ladies. It’s a lovely day, isn’t it?” He reached for an apple and paid the man coin for it before he polished it on his chest and took a bite, casually, as if he hadn’t noticed the three staring at him moments ago.

Time seemed to be lost in those moments. A blue gaze wandered over the figure that was Frederick Hale across the way, and Kenna was taken back in time almost. Those stolen glances at the Marquis home, the sneaking around, that grin he was currently giving his friend could turn downright devilish if he wanted. She knew he’d given it to her once. She didn’t realize it but soon, those blue eyes met his browns. He saw her, and rather than turn around, or avert her gaze, she was frozen in place.

There was a longing in her eyes and an ache in her chest. She’d had to try and make it seem like breaking things off would be the best for both of them. After all, in their society, it would be a giant scandal for him to be seeing a maid. He needed to find a proper wife to wed. And Kenna? She was playing a game of pretending. A game that was dangerous, pretending she was something she wasn’t. An innocent little maid she was not. She was a monster who used people for her adoptive father's gain. Frederick Hale deserved so much more and better than lowly little Oralee Smith. It wasn’t even her real name.

Mary’s shrill quiet shriek that he was coming over made Kenna realize that Freddy had bid his friend goodbye and was approaching the stand. She vaguely registered that he’d nodded at them earlier, and it was finally then that she averted her gaze. A slight flush appearing on her face as her heart began to race.

What are you doing Fred? Don’t come over. The smart part of her brain was saying. The foolish part was causing her heart to sputter. Prudence and Mary quickly looked like they were occupied with their vegetables, however Mary kept looking up with that school girl sigh. Her friend practically beamed at Freddy as he stood beside the vegetable cart, and he greeted them. “It is!” She exclaimed. Kenna kept her head down, though a part of her did want to at least see how he was fairing. Just because they couldn’t be together didn’t mean they couldn’t be friends right?

You know the answer to that… A voice warned. Her blue gaze flickered around the street. Trying to see if she recognized any of Randal’s men. She didn’t see anyone yet, and quickly picked up the remaining carrots and put them in her basket. “How are you, Lord Hale? Will you be visiting the Fox’s again this season?” Mary asked. Prudence nudged her in the side, trying to remind her to remember herself. Kenna found herself shifting, moving away from where she was at, going to the other side of the stand, but closer to where Freddy was standing without Mary and Prudence directly right there. She made it look like she was looking at produce just as Mary decided to go into detail about what they were doing, and that she was sure their young lord would be delighted to see him. Prudence threw in her two cents as well when Mary had to stop her rambling to breathe.

God bless Ms. Watson. The housekeeper spotted Mary and Prudence chatting away, and quickly requested their help. Clearly trying to save Freddy from any further botherment. Kenna couldn’t help the small smile on her face as she put a few potatoes in her basket and then retrieved the coin to give to the stand owner while Mary and Prudence gave a hurried “good day!’ to Freddy before hurrying off. Kenna couldn’t help the small laugh and shake of her head. Freddy should consider himself lucky Mary hadn’t talked his ear off. He was far too polite to tell Mary to stop talking.

She came up beside him to hand over the coin and found her eyes drifted up to his face. “My condolences for your father, Lord Hale.” She said softly. Despite calling things off between them, it didn’t mean she didn’t care, and she hoped the look she gave him showed that.

A warm and gentle smile took over his features as the ladies greeted him, asked him how he was doing and if he would be fixing the Fox’s this season. He responded first with a small nod, his smile never leaving his face. “I am well, thank you… And yes, I am sure I will be visiting at some point.” His family and the Fox family had always been friendly towards one another. It was where he had met Oralee. And although it perhaps wasn’t the greatest of ideas to be near where she was, he couldn’t deny his friend his company when he would be expecting it.

Frederick stood there quietly listening as the two ladies talked his ear off. He politely nodded every so often, his smile remaining intact and he seemed to play it off quite well that he was interested in hearing whatever the two spoke of. In reality, however, his mind couldn’t stop thinking about the other lady who stood there quietly amongst them, that he could barely hear what she was saying.

When the other lady came over and requested their assistance, he offered them another nod, “good day.” He politely returned the sentiment and watched as they left, completely aware that Oralee was not going with them. It wasn’t long after that he heard her laughing, that he turned to look at her. His smile slowly faded only slightly as she gave her condolences. Frederick nodded and then forced a small smile. “Thank you…”

What else was there really to say? He knew that she meant it though, and despite everything, he appreciated it. Even though they may have interacted with one another the same way they were now, due to being in public, it made his heartache because he knew that it was no longer just an act. It was the way it was now.

“I trust you are doing well, Miss Smith?” He asked her, the tone of his voice sincere and genuinely interested.